Medications Archive

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    I’ve stumped my therapist and psychiatrist, they cannot seem to find a cause or a cure to stop this behavior. It’s embarrassing in public, but I cannot stop. When I go to see my psychiatrist, I cannot stand up and say, “hey this is not working for me, this is not helping,” it’s always me agreeing on everything they say just to get out of there. Even with my therapist I still keep most things to myself.

    Transitioning, One Day At a Time

    I would like to welcome the newest member of our writing team, Jordan. In their first post with us, they talk about choosing whether or not to medically transition. Thanks for sharing with us, Jordan!
    I’ve been anxious for as long as I can remember. As a child, social situations were nerve-wracking. As a teenager, I was already worried about getting into college, getting a job, and living independently. And as an adult, even with therapy and medication, anxiety continues to be a challenge that affects me daily.
    So it’s no surprise that when I started to explore my gender identity, my anxiety kicked in full force.

    My Experience with Medical Marijuana as a Psychiatric Medication and Harm Reduction Strategy

    Trigger Warnings: suicidal ideation, grief, alcoholism, drug use.

    When I first came to medical marijuana, I was desperate. Fighting Schizoaffective Disorder, alcoholism, PTSD, the recent death of my wife, chronic anxiety, and newly recovered childhood abuse memories, all I wanted was to be put out of my misery. I told my therapist, “When an animal is broken, you either shoot it or put it out to pasture comfortably, I’ll take either one.”

    Small Steps: Adventures in Prescriptions and Dosing

    After a lot of work with my psychiatrist, we managed to, more or less, titrate my medications to acceptable doses that managed my anxiety and depression (again, more or less). Primarily, these were my Paxil and Wellbutrin, which are my long term maintenance medications. A little bit of Ambien here to counter the side effects, and a little bit of Klonopin there to pick up the occasional slack (an intense background social anxiety), and I’m pretty much golden.

    Needles, Fear, and T

    Trigger Warning: for those afraid of needles.

    I have a fear of needles.

    It is a pretty common fear. It kind of makes sense. I mean, needles do hurt, often just a tiny bit and but sometimes quite a lot, depending on what they’re doing. Plus, they invade some of the most private parts of our bodies and remove parts of us or put new things inside of us. It’s creepy. And people don’t always ask permission before they put needles inside us (although they almost always should). Needles can help us, but they can also harm us and/or reveal things about us that we may not wholly want to know. Needles can be violating.

    More lists

    I really want to sleep without sleep meds. I have had insomnia off and on for almost twenty years, since I was fifteen. When I was younger, it was usually trouble getting to sleep. As I got older, it became trouble with staying asleep. I took Ambien every night for around a year, which at first was bliss. It stopped working, though, and I spent three weeks sleeping almost not at all. Then I got Lunesta, which I have taken every night for the last year. If my options are really not sleeping or taking meds, I am definitely willing to take meds.

    Abilify Quick Facts

    Abilify is a second-generation antipsychotic. It works by regulating dopamine, serotonin and norepinephrine levels in the brain.

    Sobriety & Resentments

    No one ever said that this whole sobriety thing would be easy but I have found that it gets a whole lot harder the longer I go. I went to AA, I got a sponsor; I did everything that they told me to do. I even managed to go to a meeting a day. Yet at the same time the longer that I stay dry the more social situations that I find myself in where I am saying to myself, maybe one more would be okay. Take for example last night, I was asked over for a social occasion and it inevitably lead to me picking up, a beer in this case. But that beer lead to Tequila shots which led to, etc. etc. I got scary drunk, more drunk then I have gotten in a long time and while nothing bad happened, and I made it home safely and managed to crawl into bed. But see my alcoholic mentally ill mind tells me that because I did that, because nothing “bad” happened that it must be okay for me to drink again.

    Klonopin Quick Facts

    Klonopin belongs to the benzodiazepine family of pharmaceuticals (other examples include Xanax, Rohypnol, and Valium, to name a few). Klonopin works as an anxiolytic (antianxiety) drug, typically used in the treatment of anxiety and panic disorders.

    Two Months Later

    Editor’s note: this is a continuation of Fuck. Schizoaffective?

    It’s been two months since my diagnosis. Two months to process the psychosis, the diagnosis. Two months to adjust to new medication.