Sexual Assault Archive

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  • My Experience With Sexual Assault

    Trigger Warning: Descriptions of sexual assault while in a psychiatric facility, and being disbelieved by authorities.

    i was getting ready for bed, when they brought in another girl. i’ll admit, i engaged her in conversation for a while, but then the conversation got awkward. she started saying things like “i want to fuck you” and “you have nice boobies” to the point where i got very uncomfortable. i told her to stop or i would go to sleep, as it was late and i had already taken my night meds.

    I want Sexual Accountability

    Trigger Warning: Mention of rape

    I am beginning to pathologize the sexual desperation I have felt for a cis-male-flesh-cocked lover in my life lately. This is new for me as I have mostly never been able to enjoy penis-centric heterosexuality and I consider myself exclusively queer. I have been incredibly weighed down by my sexual dysfunction for my entire sexual life. By sexual dysfunction, I mean my inability to experience healthy arousal, be orgasmic and/or connect sexually with another person without fear of becoming triggered. I haven’t had many positive end results when attempting to experience sexual pleasure with another person of any gender/orientation.

    My Experience With Depression (Yael)

    I would like to welcome the newest member of our writing team, Yael Cohen. In her first post with us, she tells her story of battling with depression. Thanks for sharing with us, Yael!

    Trigger Warnings: Suicidal ideation, rape, sexual assault

    I havent always been this way, when I was younger I like to think I was a pretty normal, what we would now refer to as a gender fluid child. I was born with an intersex spectrum disorder. My depression started when I was about eight, as at the time I was being raped by a family “friend.” This would lead later to a diagnosis of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (at age 9) and Major Depressive Illness (at age 16) after a stay in the psychiatric ward for suicidal ideation. To top it off I spent much of my formative years in hospitals as I was born with several problems physically. Just to add to my depressed mood.

    Today, Like So Many Others, Is A Great Day

    Editor’s note: This story mentions some severe triggers. Please be careful about reading this story if you are easily triggered by the topics mentioned in our trigger warning.

    Trigger warnings: Abuse, including torture and child sexual assault, forced confinement, rape, violence, bullying, and hate crimes.

    Yesterday/today was/is a great day. A day to celebrate. Any day that slaps me upside my head and and asks, “WTF you bitching about?” is always a great day!

    Devotion

    I would like to welcome the newest member of our writing team, Reba Overkill. In its first post with us, it speaks through poetry to recall its struggle with being heard by the people who matter. Thanks for sharing with us, Reba!

    Trigger Warning: allusions to sexual abuse, self-injury & suicide attempts.

    it all came together a few nights ago, weak and bent
    in your lap, feeling lost, feeling like it was years ago when
    i was never anything like the me that you know. i was
    someone who was trying to speak, nobody listened and i didn’t
    understand because i can hear so fucking well, i listened and
    i heard sirens, and songs that i would sing with people who i did
    not end up loving very kindly. i heard calm assertions by
    people in authority that left cracks in parts of me. i heard
    the breath i took in when i woke up and was not dead, even
    for all my trying. i heard people leaving hints for their departure,
    inclining heads towards one-way tickets to not existing.

    Misrepresentation, Diversion and Truth: Talking about SSDI

    One of the hardest things about existing in a community is that eventually you will have to meet new people. The elephant will enter the room. “What do you do?” “No, what do you do for work?” I am on SSDI, Social Security Disability Income. That means I don’t work in the technical sense. I sit around in my underwear drinking iced coffee and working on my novel while the government sees fit to direct deposit funds every month. I go to the grocery store and use food stamps to buy spinach and chicken.