Info Archive

My experience in the mental hospital

Trigger warning: Involuntary restraint, abuse from hospital staff.

I was passing by an elderly man in a wheelchair, and he grabbed at my arm. I shook my arm free and pulled away from him. All of a sudden, two nurses and a tech were yelling at me, telling me to go to my room or sit down. Admittedly, after they said that, I became quite defiant, but not a danger or threat to myself or others.

Trauma is Trauma

Trigger Warning: graphic description of psychotic episode, violence

Does it change your view to know that I live with schizophrenia, and when the police came, there was no evidence anyone had broken in, no blood, no man? That’s where it gets tough. This experience, and other similarly intense experiences, are discounted because the general population doesn’t see them as ‘real’.

Transgender Day of Remembrance, 2015

Another year has gone, and sadly, so have way too many people. Transgender Day of Rememberance is the day where we remember those who have lost their lives to transphobic hatred. Please take a moment to remember them, and to recognize that the vast majority of these victims were women of colour.

Hanners Blackthorne,
Creator, QueerMentalHealth.org

My Experience With Sexual Assault

Trigger Warning: Descriptions of sexual assault while in a psychiatric facility, and being disbelieved by authorities.

i was getting ready for bed, when they brought in another girl. i’ll admit, i engaged her in conversation for a while, but then the conversation got awkward. she started saying things like “i want to fuck you” and “you have nice boobies” to the point where i got very uncomfortable. i told her to stop or i would go to sleep, as it was late and i had already taken my night meds.

You Don’t Have To Forgive Your Abuser

The rhetoric of forgiveness in this world today is such that it can be employed as a bludgeon against victims of abuse. “You need to forgive your abuser so you can both move on with your lives.” “You’ll feel better about yourself if you forgive them.” “You’re too invested in your victimhood to see the bigger picture.” “Your abuser is a human being too, with feelings.”

Mental Illness and a Chronic Illness

On top of having OCD, EDNOS, BPD, and ADHD, I also have IDDM — Insulin dependent diabetes mellitus.

Basically, I’m a type 1 juvenile diabetic. And the mental health care system isn’t equipped to deal with that, so every time I go into the hospital, I come back with diabetic ketoacidosis.

Fun.

Four Ways to Help Show Support to a Loved One with a Phobia

I would like to welcome the newest member of our writing team, Nic Alea. In their first post with us, they give valuable tips on how to support someone with a phobia or other anxiety disorder. Thanks for sharing with us, Nic!

One thing that has hurt me over the years is my consistent effort to try and tell people that I have Ichthyophobia (Fear of Fish) and people not taking it seriously. Well it’s serious. This phobia, although somewhat uncommon, can trigger me anywhere, whether it’s a picture on the internet or in a museum, a fish market, or walking into a shop with a fish tank, shit can be really scary sometimes. It’s already hard to tell people intimate things about ourselves and it’s even worse when people don’t believe it.

Pansexual Erasure vs Support

“Stop trying to be so different!”
Erasure has never hurt so much.
Now I know how my pansexual brothers and sisters feel.
Erasure. Phobia. Hatred. Confusion.

My Experience With Leaving AA and Successfully Staying Sober

Trigger warning: mentions of alcoholism, relapse, and sexual violence

Failure is built into the punitive, guilt-ridden fabric of AA. An archaic framework of Christian dogma marketed as the only way to get sober. If you fail it’s your fault. If you succeed it’s God’s miracle. Every meeting we recited that those who drink after AA are “naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty.” According to AA honesty in confession to unscrupulous strangers will keep you from drinking. That and the will of God.

The Story Of Bulimia

Trigger Warning: Descriptions of eating disorders

It all started when I was 13. I was looking up “how to be emo” on youtube. I can’t even remember why, I just was, okay? “How to be anorexic” popped up in the suggested searches, so I clicked on it, and it brought me to this whole new world, where thin was the ultimate goal, where eating was unacceptable, where “fat” was the point at which nothing was worth it anymore. It gave me something to focus on as I delved deeper into my mental illness. I looked up tips. I looked up thinspo. I looked up extremely dangerous restrictive diets. Anything related to eating disorders, I would find it on the internet.