self-acceptance Archive

Naming Names – Putting Agoraphobia Into Words

I still don’t know how to talk about agoraphobia. I’ve been trying to figure out how to explain it to people since I was 16 years old, but I’ve been largely unsuccessful at putting it into words. I’ve mostly just stayed quiet about it and used vague “anxiety” euphemisms to describe why I can’t hang out / go to work / go to class / go grocery shopping / whatever, and have also spent a lot of time struggling to come up with “legitimate” ways to account for what I do with my time while NOT doing these things, especially since spending [lots of] time alone or in my “safe zones” is actually super positive for me. For almost 20 years, I’ve had no concept of how to talk about this enormous part of me that has both limited me in humongous ways and also shaped me into the wonderful weirdo that the people close to me know and love.

Fighting for Responsibility of Ourselves

I would like to welcome the newest member of our writing team, Kaity Marie Baldwin. In her first post with us, she talks about taking responsibility for one’s own mental health. Thanks for sharing with us, Kaity!

It took me a long time to realize how lucky I was: a psychiatrist, a therapist, medication. All of these arranged in my life to provide the support I so desperately needed but wished I didn’t. Who wants to see a psychiatrist for the rest of their lives? Who wants to need therapy sessions? Support can sometimes be a reminder of why you need it, and it makes you feel so helpless.

Today, Like So Many Others, Is A Great Day

Editor’s note: This story mentions some severe triggers. Please be careful about reading this story if you are easily triggered by the topics mentioned in our trigger warning.

Trigger warnings: Abuse, including torture and child sexual assault, forced confinement, rape, violence, bullying, and hate crimes.

Yesterday/today was/is a great day. A day to celebrate. Any day that slaps me upside my head and and asks, “WTF you bitching about?” is always a great day!

A letter I wish I could send

Okay, family member. Do you think you are doing me and your son a favor by donating to Autism Speaks? You’re not. I don’t care how good your intentions are. First let’s take a look at Autism Speaks’ mission statement: At Autism Speaks, our goal is to change the future for all who struggle with […]

I Wear My Scars on the Outside. Where are Yours?

My lack of privilege comes with a choice. A choice to be visible, or invisible. People prefer invisibility, especially when someone else is unlike herself, or perhaps far too much like himself. Lucky for me, it is not my responsibility to dictate what others think of me.

My labels

pansexual
crazy
queer
transgender
insecure
daughter
kinky
mentally ill

Redefining My Dreams

A terrible crime has been committed, a brutal murder. The suspect? Mental Illness. The victim? My dreams. In the past 3 years, I have gone from a successful professional with a promising career and a wonderful loving partner, to an emotional wreck, unsure if I am even able to hold down a full time job anymore.

Checking Out, Letting Go: On Acceptance of Dissociation and Depersonalization

Trigger warning for discussions of dissociation, depersonalization, hallucination, society treating mental differences like shit, abuse and trauma, and reactions to trauma, etc.

I dissociate. Depersonalize. It’s sort of like when everything becomes so intense that everything I am, takes one step (or a few) back from my body.

Coming Out and Breaking Down

After I sobered up, I started realizing pretty quickly that I was at least as attracted to women as I was to men. Not that I didn’t already know that, but now I knew it in a way that I could feel. It wasn’t about having loaded sex with anyone I could get my hands on anymore. It was about feeling things in my mind and body and relating to them.

What To Do When Nothing’s Working

I am going to attempt to make this useful, even though a large part of the focus of this article is to release frustration. I also hope that this will be of some help to others of you who may be suffering, despite your best efforts to get help for yourself. I understand that not […]