high school Archive

Naming Names – Putting Agoraphobia Into Words

I still don’t know how to talk about agoraphobia. I’ve been trying to figure out how to explain it to people since I was 16 years old, but I’ve been largely unsuccessful at putting it into words. I’ve mostly just stayed quiet about it and used vague “anxiety” euphemisms to describe why I can’t hang out / go to work / go to class / go grocery shopping / whatever, and have also spent a lot of time struggling to come up with “legitimate” ways to account for what I do with my time while NOT doing these things, especially since spending [lots of] time alone or in my “safe zones” is actually super positive for me. For almost 20 years, I’ve had no concept of how to talk about this enormous part of me that has both limited me in humongous ways and also shaped me into the wonderful weirdo that the people close to me know and love.

Envy

Trigger Warning: mention of abuse

When I was a freshman in high school, my English teacher assigned the first essay of the semester. The topic was “time I felt different”. This proved to be a surprisingly difficult topic for me to write about. Why? Then, I had no idea what it was like to fit in. I had no frame of reference.

My Experience With Anorexia (Yael)

Trigger Warning: Mention of suicidal ideation

I don’t recall exactly when my battle with anorexia started, but I seem to remember other people noticing it when I was about fourteen. Maybe the fact that I had always been unhealthy due to multiple medical conditions that caused me to have to travel to Vancouver, British Columbia, almost monthly for often painful or at least uncomfortable tests to try and give a treatable diagnosis; a process that seemed to always be in vain.

My Experience with Bullying (Katie)

Trigger Warning: Bullying, School Violence

I had never even met these kids before. One of them came up to me while I was at my locker and just said “Whatchu been sayin’ about my mama?” I had no idea what he was talking about – I’d never even seen him to my recollection. So I basically ignored him and went back to dealing with my locker.

My Experience with Psychotic Depression (Micah)

I am not sure where to start. There is so little I remember. I’m not even certain of my exact diagnosis now. Is it psychotic depression or schizoaffective disorder? Or something else? It doesn’t really matter.

Be As

Trigger warning for graphic description of bullying

Adrian noticed him looking and turned his face away his cheeks red. “I always get picked on.” He said quietly. “About being new, about my scar, about being ugly and anti-social.” There was a touch of bitterness in his voice and he looked away again, voice dropping to a whisper. “and about being ….gay…” For some reason, Adrian knew he could trust the strange boy with this fact.

My Experience with Schizophrenia (Coda)

Trigger warnings for description of psychotic episodes and a suicide attempt, in detail, and violent imagery.

I have Schizophrenia. I find certain words can lose their sting when we just come out and say them. So I’m saying it. I live with Schizophrenia. This is my story.

Remembering Jamie Hubley

Another day, another LGBTQ youth suicide. I am sad to report that 15-year old Jamie Hubley, from Kanata, Ontario, Canada ended his life on Saturday, overwhelmed by loneliness and homophobic bullying. On his Tumblr, he expressed his pain and depression for months. In his final post, he said the following: Its just too hard. I […]